The Original Work (One-Act Drama)

THE UNTOLD STORY OF SARDINES

Characters:

Although gender is mentioned, characters can be male or female and the script adjusted accordingly.

Pandaka: smallest fish in Bikini Bottom (Catbalogan Branch)

Sardinia: fish in the can; everyone wants to be famous like her

Espada: balikbayan friend of Pandaka; got lost but was brought back to Bikini Bottom (Catbalogan Branch)

Bolinao: leader of the Bulad Bullies Squad; wants to be a superstar

Tamban: member of the Bulad Bullies Squad

Sapsap: member of the Bulad Bullies Squad

Writer's Comment:

I have imagined that the fishes will be played walking upright as humans, and that the actors embody fish-like characteristics in their walk, mannerism, energy, speech, etc. It's a great opportunity for the actor to explore what kind of actions they can utilize to demonstrate that they are fishes.

Ultimately though, how the characters are portrayed is entirely up to the director and the actors!

SCENE 1

Inside the Fishbook Academy. Curtain opens and we see a small fish sitting on a chair in a classroom set-up. This is Pandaka. Other students enter, chattering.

Stude 1: Guys check this out. I downloaded the new photo of Sardinia. She looks so fresh here! I guess she's already famous and rich now!

Stude 2: Yeah I saw her. I want to be a superstar like her!

Stude 3: Harhar, I'll be the first one to get out from this wet place, and I'd be the next famous fish you'll see on that can!

The Bulad Bullies Squad enters. *SFX: suspense*

Tamban:  Hey pretty girls, what's that? (snatches the picture) Oh, it's Sardinia, my love.

Stude 1: Your love?

Tamban: Yeah, you got a problem with that?!

Stude 1: Uh-hhh, no-none...

Bolinao: You see baby, we know how she got there. And we can get you there, too.

Stude 2: How?! Say it!

Sapsap: Today. We will be departing from this place.

Bolinao: Wanna know how?

Pandaka stands up and butts in.

Pandaka: How? I wanna be like... like Sardinia.

Tamban: Ohhhh little Pandaka... You really wanna know how?

Pandaka: Yes. I know there's something more for me. I know a good life is waiting for me outside Bikini Bottom.

Tamban: Hahahahaha. Okay, listen up. (whispers to Pandaka) Try to get an inch bigger.

Everybody laughs.

Tamban: Silly little dreamer! It's impossible. You see, it's easier for a plankton to be caught by the fisherman's net compared to you!

Sapsap: Later, the fisherman will rescue us and you'll be the only one left on this poor place.

Bolinao: How sad! Shooo. C'mon guys, let's go out of here and let's meet the fisherman!

Everybody shouts. They mock Pandaka as they exit.

SCENE 2

Pandaka walks alone.

Pandaka: Is it bad to be small? I hate myself! Why do I need to be different?

Pandaka sits at a coral reef.

Pandaka: Ohhhh, what kind of life is this? They'll all be famous and I'll be stuck here on this... (an engine interrupts Pandaka from speaking and she saw a school of fish crowding near the area)

Pandaka: This is my chance. I'm going out of Bikini Bottom!

Pandaka dives in to the crowd of multitude of fishes wanting to be caught by the net. The fisherman cast the trammel, everybody got caught except Pandaka.

Fisherman exits with all his catch. Pandaka left on stage.

Pandaka: It's so unfair!!!

SCENE 3

At the MARKET. Bolinao, Tamban and Sapsap woke up because of the noise around them.

Bolinao: Where are we?

Tamban: I do

n't know. I can't breathe!

Sapsap: Don't worry. Before becoming famous, we must endure!

Bolinao: You're right. There are so many people here. Oh, there's where we come from! I need to go back, I can't breathe!

Tamban: No, we need to wait. I know we'll be brought to a more comfortable place.

Fisherman arrives. Divides the fishes into groups and put them in different containers.

Tamban: No, no! Please, Sapsap, Bolinao, don't let go!

The three cries as they were carried into different places.

SCENE 4

Tamban wakes up at a home setting.

Father: What do we have for lunch, honey?

Mother: I bought some fresh fishes to fry.

Mother heads to the kitchen. Opens the stove, put cooking oil on the pan, washes the fish

es.

Tamban: W-w-wait. Who are you? What are you doing to me? No! Don't put salt on my sexy body, I'm allergic to that!

Mother: This would be a tasty meal.

Tamban: No!!!

Mother cooks Tamban. Tamban died.

SCENE 5

Sapsap wakes up at an office setting.

Kid: Mommy, what's that?

Mommy: I brought you a new pet! (shows Sapsap to the kid)

Kid: Really, Mommy? Yehay! It's beautiful!

Mommy: Get the aquarium and we'll put it there.

Kid rushes out to get the aquarium.

Sapsap: Woah, aquarium! Sounds cool. I guess that's where they put the fish superstars. Oh yeah baby, I'm on my way to stardom!

Kid comes back with his aquarium. Puts Sapsap inside. Sapsap happily roams around the aquarium but after hundred times of circling the aquarium...

Sapsap: So that's it. I'm stuck here. What a good life! (sarcastic face)

SCENE 6

Tamban wakes up at a factory setting.

Tamban sees numerous cans with the face of Sardinia imprinted on it.

Tamban: Thi is it! I'll be thte most famous fish in the whole wide world!

Tamban's head was cut and he was immediately put inside the can.

SCENE 7

In the BIKINI BOTTOM. Pandaka is so lonely.

Pandaka: I wonder what had happened to them. Maybe they're already enjoying a good life.

Espada enters.

Espada: Pandaka, my friend! I miss you so much!

Pandaka: Espada, is that you? Espada! I thought you'd never come back.

Espada: I'm so glad that I was able to go back. If only you know what I've gone through. Where are the others?

Pandaka: They're all gone. They left Bikini Bottom to be famous and rich like Sardinia. And I'm left all alone here, 'cause I'm too small to go there, on the real world.

Espada: Huh! You're blessed that you were not able to go there. Be thankful, 'cause anyone who goes there dies. Sardinia? She's already dead. She was put into a can to be sold and be eaten. And the others? They all have the same fate.

Pandaka: And how about you? How did you survive?

Espada: Because I'm also small, I fell from the fishnet and I crawled hard to go back to the sea. That's why, I'm here. Alive, kicking and swimming!

Pandaka: Now, we know the truth. Thanks, Pandaka!

Immediate blackout and curtains close.

-THE END-